Wisdom From an Ancient Rule for Monks
A Rule Written for Monks is for Everyone
The Rule of St. Benedict is the document that governs the lives of Benedictine monks. Although written by a 6th century Roman, Benedict possessed a remarkable understanding of human nature which makes the rule an ideal guide for living for just about anyone, even if you're not a monk. I should know, I tried both. After almost 10 years as a monk, I discovered that the rule is just as much of a guide for seculars living outside of the monastery as it is for monks living inside a monastery.
Community Is a Necessary Component
Community living is actually an essential component in a monk's search for God. That's in part why he comes to the monastery in the first place. The Benedictine monk seeks God in community, under a rule and an abbot. Those are really the only requirements for entering a monastery. Benedict rejects the stereotype of the monk as a loner. The eremetical life, that is, the life of hermits who live in complete solitude is not the type of life Benedict wants for his followers. He sees others as another way God speaks to the monk.
The same is true for the rest of us who aren't monks. Other people in my life can be the vox Dei, or the voice of God, calling me, reminding me, challenging me in ways that I might not have been aware of otherwise.
Most monks will tell you that dealing with their brethren charitably, can be the most challenging part of a monk's life. Dealing with others is the most challenging part of anyone's life! It's easy to get along with people on a good day, when you've had enough sleep, you're feeling well, and having a great day. That's anyone. Monks are no different. They're not angels. Monks aren't infused with supernatural abilities or powers.
Community Is a Testing Ground
When it comes right down to it, my interaction with others shows how much I've integrated prayer into every other area of my life. After all, I'm able to control myself, but I can't control others. A monk just can't say, "today I'm going to avoid people." It doesn't work that way in a monastery.
The psychologist and priest, Adrian Van Kaam describes three areas of relating that exist in every human person: the spiritual self, the social self, and the psychological self. My relationship to God is the spiritual self. How I relate to others he identifies as "the social self." And the psychological self is how I relate to me.
Van Kaam uses a Venn diagram to illustrate the relationship between the three. The small area where all three circles overlap he calls, "the integrated self." That's where a person is "centered". Van Kaam's point is to live and act from my center because that's where I am the most authentic.
An Organizational Guide for Spiritual Communities
Quentin Skrabek, PhD, an industrial management expert, described Benedict's rule as not so much a spiritual guide, but an organizational guide for spiritual communities. In other words, Benedict wrote a practical rule of life in order for a group of monks to get along and even thrive both as individuals and as a community.
The Importance of Others
If the Covid pandemic taught anything, it's how important human interaction is to my well-being. Community can take many shapes. I can belong to my family community, work community, social community, church community, and so on. The point is, I need others in my life to grow as a human being and to grow spiritually.